light

"For once you were full of darkness, but now you have light from the Lord. 

So live as people of light!" 

Ephesians 5:8

eat, pray, love God

"Do not look at the world through your head; look at it through your heart." Ketut

Recently, Mom and I went to see the movie, “Eat, Pray, Love” with Julia Roberts. After a messy divorce (and an even messier rebound relationship), the main character (Liz) decides to travel the world for a year so she can reconnect with her heart, find out who she was created to be, and what she's to do with her life. She went to Italy, India, and Bali. And each place she traveled to she had to learn the language, the customs, and the culture of the people. It was hard for her to adjust, and she didn't know anyone when she arrived at each of her destinations. But she was desperate for change. Desperate for something to make her feel alive again.

Many of us came to the Lord desperate for change. At the end of our ropes, or broken, or confused, angry and hurt – we come. And just like Liz, we find ourselves in a whole new world. We don't know the language, we don't know the customs, and we're not quite sure where we fit into this new life we've discovered, or even what we've been called to do.

In the movie, there was a scene where Liz was trying to order coffee at an Italian Bistro. Her Italian came out of a book, and she was hesitantly trying to order without much success. The store was slammed with people, and she couldn't be heard over the shouts of the other patrons. Another young woman saw her predicament and immediately offered to help. Asking Liz what she'd like, Delia shouted out their orders in commanding, perfect, Italian. Their friendship was deliciously sealed while noshing on Napoleons and drinking coffee.

When we become believers, God gives us tools to live in our new “country”. He's given us His Holy Spirit as our guide, and He's given us His Word as our map. He's given us the Body of Christ to equip and encourage and build ourselves up until we reach maturity together (Ephesians 4:11-15). He has not left us without resources!

Sometimes we fall back into the same patterns we were in before we came to Christ. And we think because we've changed “cities” - an earthly city for a heavenly one – that things will automatically be different. Liz found that even though she was in a completely different country, her old demons still followed her. She still carried brokenness within her. But certain people came across her path at just the right time to help her look within herself for the healing and peace she so desperately needed. We fail to realize that change comes from the inside out. If you are a child of God, your heart has been completely renewed (1 Corinthians 5:17-19)! It's our minds that need revelation and understanding (Romans 12:2). And like Liz, sometimes to find the beat of our own hearts we have to acquire a completely new perspective.

"I pray for you constantly, asking God, the glorious Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, to give you spiritual wisdom and insight so that you might grow in your knowledge of God. I pray that your hearts will be flooded with light so that you can understand the confident hope he has given to those he called—his holy people who are his rich and glorious inheritance." Ephesians 1:16-18

a little more

This song has been with me all day...thought I'd pass it on to you. <3

irresistible worship

Yesterday I had a friend ask me what I thought a corporate worship experience should look like. I made a comment that God believed that worship should be all about Him. We discussed it further, but I still came home pondering that question later.  

What exactly does bless God's heart? What does He find so irresistible that He can't help but show up?

This morning I ran across this section of scripture that describes an amazing encounter with the Presence of God:

"It came even to pass, as the trumpeters and singers were as one, to make one sound to be heard in praising and thanking the Lord; and when they lifted up their voice with the trumpets and cymbals and instruments of musick, and praised the Lord, saying, 'For He is good, and His mercy endureth for ever': that then the house was filled with a cloud, even the house of the Lord, so that the priests could not stand to minister by reason of the cloud: for the glory of the Lord had filled the house of God." 2 Chronicles 5:13 KJV

Now this is an excellent picture of a rockin' worship service that occurred when Solomon was dedicating the new temple. Here are the things that really got my attention:

1. The singers and musicians were worshiping the Lord "as one". They were in UNITY.
2. They were doing two things: PRAISING and THANKING the Lord.
3. What were they proclaiming? God's GOODNESS and His MERCY.
4. As a result, the house was filled with His glory, and...
5. The religious establishment (the priests) fell down!

Even though this is an Old Testament picture of a worshipful experience, I still believe it has merit on this side of the Cross. God has called us to worship Him in unity (let them be one as we are One...John 17:22-23). We're called to praise and thank Him for what He's done and is now doing in our lives. We know it is the GOODNESS of God that leads us to repentance (Romans 2:4), and that His mercy endures forever (Psalm 107:1 NKJV). YES!!!

So, a worship experience that blesses God's heart has these elements: unity, praise, thanksgiving, and acknowledgement of His goodness and mercy. We need to get a revelation of the goodness and mercy of our God before the glory of the Lord call fill our "house" - our heart wherein He dwells. And when the glory of the Lord shows up, the religious spirit falls down! Woo-Hoo!

it's all about YOU

if i've heard it once i've heard it a thousand times -

"it's NOT all about you."

most of the time you hear this from preachers behind a pulpit/podium/podcast as they try to stir their congregation to acts of service. i've also said it as a parent when one of my kids get prideful or out of line. but this morning i had this amazing epiphany. sometimes, it is about you. and about me.

the bible says that it was for the JOY set before Him that Jesus endured the cross:

"Therefore, since we have so great a cloud of witnesses surrounding us, let us also lay aside every encumbrance and the sin which so easily entangles us, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, despising the shame, and has sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." Hebrews 12:1-2

for one breathtaking moment in history, it was ALL about you.

you were the joy set before Him. you were the reason He willingly laid down everything He was, so you could become an heir of everything He has. what a debt we owe to Him! how could we possibly fathom the love that sent Him to the cross in our place? 

His death was only the beginning...

the grave had no choice but to be a witness to the greatest coup that hell had ever experienced: the Resurrection. and we celebrate Easter because Jesus conquered death, hell, and the grave. if Jesus had remained in the grave, then my hope is futile. as a Believer, everything i put my trust in would be a sham. and if that were the case i certainly wouldn't be wasting my time writing about such dribble. but over 500 witnesses testify to the fact that the tomb could not hold the sinless lamb of God.

and THAT's something to celebrate! 

i love how the message bible puts this same scripture into a passionate plea. as you read the words below let them sink deep down into your spirit. because He lives, we have the same resurrection power residing on the inside of us as Believers. don't lose sight of where you are going and what He is calling you to do. go over the triumph of Easter again and again until your heart is set on fire by the very joy that filled His soul at calvary.

"Strip down, start running—and never quit! No extra spiritual fat, no parasitic sins. Keep your eyes on Jesus, who both began and finished this race we're in. Study how he did it. Because he never lost sight of where he was headed—that exhilarating finish in and with God—he could put up with anything along the way: Cross, shame, whatever. And now he's there, in the place of honor, right alongside God. When you find yourselves flagging in your faith, go over that story again, item by item, that long litany of hostility he plowed through. That will shoot adrenaline into your souls!" Hebrews 12:1-3 MSG

may this Easter find you more in love with the Savior than you ever believed possible, and may you rest secure in the fact that He has risen...

He has risen indeed!

pssstttt...

new post up at:

www.whispersinmyear.com

love you guys...have an amazing Easter!

simplicity

after stuffing myself on sesame chicken one night from our favorite neighborhood chinese restaurant, i cracked opened my fortune cookie. this is what it said:

"you simplify your life in many ways and find great rewards."

i don't usually hold on to fortune cookie messages, but i've held onto this one. you see, God's been speaking to me for months about simplicity. and even though this message came out of a fortune cookie, i know the message is wisdom. truly, God uses the foolish things of the world to confound the wise.

but the more i think about it, the more i realize it takes a lot of work to get to a place of simplicity. some days it seems terribly elusive, and just out of my grasp.

there's one thing that i try to pursue above all others - and that's loving Jesus with all my heart, soul, mind and strength. being one with Him in heart, mind and spirit...i crave it above all other things. and the "things" of this world frustrate me even more because this is my heart's greatest desire.

i crave the simplicity of knowing Him, and who i am in Him. i know i have to start here, because He promised that if i seek first "His kingdom and His righteousness, all these things will be given to (me) as well" (Matthew 6:33).

one morning i was spinning my wheels - i was so overwhelmed with life in general. and i heard the Lord's still, small voice say, "Come to Me." and what He spoke to my heart filled me with hope and life once more.

i forget sometimes to run to Him in the midst of the chaos.

when Jesus was sleeping in a boat during a violent storm, it wasn't because He was ignoring the situation or waiting to see what His disciples were going to do about the problem. He was living within His reality of peace. His world is peace. (the Word calls Him the "Prince of peace".) so for me to find peace, and the simplicity i so desperately crave, i have to hide myself in Him. it may take work getting there, but the rewards are well worth the effort.

i have discovered this one overwhelming truth: i cannot have simplicity in the world around me, until it is manifested in the world within me.

"For our boast is this, the testimony of our conscience, that we behaved in the world with simplicity and godly sincerity, not by earthly wisdom, but by the grace of God, and supremely so toward you." 2 Corinthians 1:12 NLT

carry

"Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." ~ Galatians 6:2

dreaming...

if you had unlimited resources at your disposal, what would you do with them? buy a yacht? hire a maid? go on a trip around the world?

we've all heard the question before.

but what if...what if...

what if we dared to dream?

i had an unusual dream one night that the Lord brought back to my mind yesterday. it was a really odd dream actually. i was in a multi-storied building in the middle of a city that was exclusively made just for teens. the bottom floor had a huge dance floor and a stage for live bands. somewhere on another floor there was a really amazing food court. and the upper floor contained different rooms for creative expression. i remember there was an art studio, and a basketball court, and other rooms used for instruction in various things. everywhere you looked there were teens, and there were adult mentors available just to hang out and talk with. it was an extraordinary facility, but not because of all the physical things it had to offer. no, the extraordinary part was that i KNEW that this was a place that was equipped to pull the treasure out of our youth. this was a place where they could safely explore who God had created them to be. the whole goal of the place was to create an environment for potential - to encourage not only their spiritual well-being, but also to recognize and encourage unique giftings in each young person.

it was a place for dreams.

in my dream i remember walking and jumping from one place to another...floating and jumping and watching. i felt lighter than air, because the atmosphere was so charged with hope.

how i would love to see this particular dream become reality...

habits

so last night after i said prayers with becca she asked me what my worst habit was. i told her i didn't really know (but of course i had a few things in mind), and then asked her what SHE thought my worst habit was. (now, we all know that it's dangerous to ask a child a question like this, because they don't have the same "filters" adults do and will tell you EXACTLY what they think...but i couldn't resist.)

"well, you don't do maddie's hair anymore," she said.

"hmmm...," i replied. "so what do you think is my best habit?" i asked.

"you LOVE your quiet time mom. you really, really love your quiet time, and talking to God," she said.

that absolutely made my week. it's good to know that even though i don't take time to do hair anymore (what planet was she on last week when i was braiding her AND her sister's hair btw???), that at least my other priorities are in line! haha...

when i asked her what she thought her worst habit was she said...

"saying 'moooo' all the time."

alrighty then! i hadn't even noticed she did this, but just to demonstrate, she began to make the most excellent cow sounds imaginable. yep, now it's all coming back to me...

her best habit in her mind is her love of crafts. she loves to paint, draw, color, sculpt...you name it she loves it. all three of my kids have artistic ability, but becca is the only one who really loves it as much as i do. so cool to see her gifts develop right under our noses.

family

"other things may change us, but we start and end with family." ~ anthony brandt

a delightful diversion indeed...

okay, just for the record, i have the most amazing friends. kim and jill have introduced me to the world of all things jane austen, and i must admit that i'm completely smitten. about once every other month we get together with other homeschool moms and watch our favorite movies made from the books, with an occasional jaunt into other period movies.

fun stuff!

well, tonight was a bit of a surprise. because we got to watch two movies instead of the usual one. we watched persuasion, realized it wasn't dark enough outside to even think about going home, and then jill pulled pride and prejudice out of her purse.

persuasion was...*sigh* wonderful as always.

pride & prejudice...well, i think i lost a few brain cells on that one. funny in some parts, completely ludicrous in others. the kissing scene after he was run over by kitty was probably the most awkwardly funny part.

all in all it was a great night with too much food and much-needed laughter. most of us are so ready for spring break we can reach out and just touch it. jenny, as always is a fabulous hostess and we all love the fact she has a tv the size of her wall upstairs. 

only one sad note - quinn called me to say austin's now running a 102 degree fever with a sore throat. guess we'll be paying a visit to the doctor in the morning.

hide me

"The Lord is near to all who call on Him,

to all who call on Him in truth." Psalm 145:18

sometimes i believe i can fool God. sometimes i think that He doesn't really know what i'm struggling with, and i try to put a happier spin on the situations i find myself in so i "look" better in His eyes. or i think that maybe i can somehow figure things out on my own.

crazy.

i forget that He knows EVERYTHING. yep, everything. and the only thing He really requires of me is that i come to Him in truth. that means i am completely transparent and honest with whatever i'm struggling with - great or small. it means that i stop pretending i have all the answers and admit that He's the only one who can see from an eternal perspective.

"All my longings lie open before You, O Lord;

my sighing is not hidden from You." Psalm 38:9

since the incident in the Garden, we have the tendency to default to the position of hiding. just like adam and eve, we hide in our hearts from the One who's constantly pursuing us for intimacy. hiding, in any form it takes, keeps us from the love of God.

however, He does condone one particular kind of hiding...

hiding in Him.

"Since you have been raised to new life with Christ, set your sights on the realities of heaven, where Christ sits in the place of honor at God's right hand. Think about the things of heaven, not the things of earth. For you died to this life, and your real life is hidden with Christ in God." Colossians 3:1-3 NLT

i love this word - my real life is hidden in Him. and as long as i come to Him in a spirit of truth, transparency, and humility, then i can share in His abundant life as well. 

and that's something to shout about!

"I came that they may have and enjoy life, and have it in abundance (to the full, till it overflows)." John 10:10b AMP

picnik

so my friend rachel is creating all kinds of cool photo projects right now. and one of the photo editing programs she uses is called picnik. the website says that:

Picnik makes your photos fabulous with easy to use yet powerful editing tools. Tweak to your heart’s content, then get creative with oodles of effects, fonts, shapes, and frames.

the pic of me and the girls above was created using this program. there's basic editing features for you to use for free, and more advanced features for a small fee. i signed up to try it out for a month for less than $5.00, and they took Paypal (which is always a real plus with me!). and my favorite feature of the program so far?

wrinkle remover! haha...

cut

this is the second year in a row our venus flytrap has put out a flower stalk. only this time, it's decided to put out not one, but THREE flower stalks. last year we cut off the stalk after it had bloomed, because when we did some research we found that making flowers actually will kill the flytrap. fortunately though, our little plant lived to see another summer. i keep trying to talk my son into letting it go dormant over the winter, but he just can't seem to do it. we've had it for several years now - a record for us.

so we're presented with a dilemma now - to cut or not to cut? with three flower stalks growing, i'm sure our plant will be too exhausted to survive. and it's not like the seeds it may produce will get planted. they're incredibly small to begin with.

this poor plant is putting all it's effort into reproducing.

it kinda reminds me of myself at times.

there have been seasons in my life when i have poured all my energies into those things that would eventually destroy something precious to me. for years i've gone round and round that merry-go-round. and invariably i would hit a brick wall. to cut or not to cut? "but i feel so productive in this area!", i'd say. "surely this is God's will for my life!", i'd exclaim...not realizing that what i was doing was sucking the life out of me, my marriage and my family. but i'd go to God, presenting my "fruit" to Him in prayer. and He would begin...

cutting.

but over time i've noticed that those areas He has brought pruning into my life have become more fruitful. as painful as the cutting was, now i had something even more precious in it's place:

peace.

and there's never been anything in my life He's asked me to lay down that i have not reaped back in greater measure.

"I am the true vine, and my Father is the gardener. He cuts off every branch in me that bears no fruit, while every branch that does bear fruit he prunes so that it will be even more fruitful." john 15:1-2

still

 "Be still and know that I am God." Psalm 46:10

i am currently reading a book by bill johnson called "Dreaming with God". in the very first chapter, he addresses the difference between being a "servant" and being a "friend" of God. servants are obedient because they are required to be, while friends are obedient because they want to please their Lord in every way. he quoted pastor mike bickle as saying:

"...there are lovers and there are workers. And lovers get more work done than do workers!"

johnson continues to say that, "A passionate lover will always outperform a good servant in pleasing Him."

amen!

so today i am praying for a spirit that can be still and know He is God. i refuse to be martha today, and i choose to embrace the extravagant example of love that mary presents. it is through sitting still in His presence and being filled with His Spirit that we become a force in this world to be reckoned with.

"Left alone!" What different emotions these words bring to mind for each of us! To some they mean loneliness and grief, but to others they may mean rest and quiet. To be left alone without God would be too horrible for words, while being left alone with Him is a taste of heaven! And if His followers spent more time alone with Him, we would have spiritual giants again. ~ from Streams in the Desert devotional

remember that aaron's staff was left alone in the presence of God - and it bore fruit. how much more will our lives bear fruit for His kingdom as we continue to sit at His feet!

just keep swimming...

our pastor was speaking this morning on how everyone falls down...the important thing being that we continue to get back up.

he also said that we are tested during the times that we receive praise from men, and also during the times people are throwing rocks at our heads. the Lord revealed to him that if he succumbed to the praises of men on his way up in the world, he would be sucked into criticism from those very same people on his way back down. i'm paraphrasing of course, but the concept is the same. the key is not to be moved by either praise or criticism.

(please let me know if you've figured out how to effectively do this...)

i think we should kick all the pedestals down and realize that we all struggle with the same issues. different flavors maybe, but the same temptations. and we can either let them overcome us, or allow God to turn them into places of elevation into His presence.

we've got to get up and keep going. we were created for greatness...created to bring Him glory.

"just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming, swimming, swimming...what do we do? we swim!" ~ dory, "finding nemo"

falling down

when i came downstairs this morning i noticed that one of the tulips in the vase in the kitchen was completely bent over, it's flower touching the table. the water level had dropped overnight, and this one tulip was completely out of the water so it was droopy. i immediately rushed to the sink to refill the vase and returned the flowers back to the table. i carefully picked the poor flower up and gently tucked it in with all its other companions for support.

that's when it hit me.

there's this scripture in the bible that says, "If one falls down, his friend can help him up. But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!...Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken." ecclesiastes 4:10,12

i realized that this is how the body of Christ should be functioning. when one falls down, we're to pick them back up, make sure they're connected to the "water" of the Word, and embrace them until they're strong enough to stand up again. and that's what my beautiful tulip began to do...

stand tall.

productive

so after taking the kids to co-op classes today i went home, piddled around on the computer for a bit, then set my timer for one hour.

yep, i cleaned the bottom floor of the house. it was a righteous pit if i do say so...

then, i PAINTED! i've been wanting to paint for the past three weeks, but i've allowed other things to interrupt my creative flow. stupid life - always getting in the way.

becca says it looks like an angel. maddie says it looks like a crayfish. it's supposed to be a dove. hahah...truly beauty is in the eye of the beholder. oh well, i enjoyed doing it. not sure if i'm done yet, but just in case i went ahead and signed it.

it took me four tries!

my friend beth said i was channeling my inner-child today when i told her i used my fingers to paint. and yet, i keep buying paintbrushes for some reason. i guess i've always been told to be a "real" artist you need to use a brush.

whatever.

owls and loveys

i'm mentoring a fabulous young woman right now. she's being raised by her dad, and for reasons unknown to me, her mom has decided not to be a regular part of her life. and that makes me so sad, but...

God has chosen me to love her.

so friday we'll be celebrating her birthday. and i've been wracking my brain for a great present for her for a couple of weeks now. she loves owls - yes, OWLS, and so i hopped online to see what kind of owl-ly fabric i could find. i found some at etsy.com that i thought she'd love...paid more than i wanted, but she's worth it. ;) after giving her the choice of pillows or a quilt, she decided she wanted me to make her a quilt. which is a good thing because...

i want her to have a grown-up lovey.

i want her to feel loved when she wraps it around herself when she's cold or lonely or afraid and life doesn't make sense. i want her to remember each time she sees it that God has tucked her into my heart. and as i put it all together the next couple of weeks i'm gonna pray over it too.

we went to the fabric store today to find coordinating fabric. i think she's just as excited about this quilt as i am. she found the most deliciously soft fabric for the backing. it's white...just like the color of her favorite owl.

whispers

i have another website that i keep track of my more "spiritual" ramblings...you can check it out here:

www.whispersinmyear.com

hope it blesses you!

randomness

so, just for the record i hate taking the time to capitalize sentences. completely stops the flow of creativity for me sometimes. besides, this just looks more humble as well...

i'm a child of God (yep - i capitalize for Him and Jesus...oh and the Holy Spirit), a wife of almost 20 years, a mom of three, a carb junkie, a teen lover, a mentor and a friend. i like creative things from writing to painting to singing in my truck. i love the color blue. my eyes are green, even though my parents eyes were blue. i'm an optimist. i love people...

i love God.

i love getting "in the ditch" with people who are struggling...especially this incredibly precious next generation coming up under me. they have so much potential - so much LIFE held within them. i'm trying to teach them to use their powers for good instead of evil. ;) there's enough of that in the world already to just ruin everything.

i love quotes. i love wisdom and understanding and finding treasure in dark places. i love the promises of God. i have anxiety sometimes. i can be too hard on myself and others and...God's not done with me yet.

i dream of having a little house down the road from me with an overgrown yard full of wildflowers, a quaint kitchen and lots of windows to let natural light in. you know, so i can paint. a place where i wouldn't have to put anything away - a place to call my own. i think i'd have bright yellow curtains in the windows...perhaps checked blue ones in the kitchen. there'd be mismatched china in the cupboards i could pull out when friends come over. and we'd have tea and cookies. and i'd show off my latest painting and wonder if they really like it or are being nice.

it doesn't matter really. creating makes me feel close to my Creator.

thanks for stopping by...hope you've had a pleasant visit.